Me and My Selves: August. Lola. Charlie. Margot.

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Sep 15, 2014

Finding Sanctuary and Creating Happiness

There are a lot of things I want out of life. Including the freedom from dealing with backwards hierarchies, politics and the power to control the parts of my own existence that are within my grasps. It takes a lot of patience dealing with situations that you know you have no business being in, but sometimes, life puts you in places that only set you up for bigger things.

Since frustration breeds motivation, you finally decide to define your goals in life, make a plan, and begin executing each step towards your dreams. Since every seed takes time to grow, it is important that we set ourselves up to be happy during the wait. I realized that sanctuary is necessary for any person to maintain sanity and peace. Sanctuary is a place you can create specifically tailored just for you.

Sanctuary, as I observed from A Series of Unfortunate Events, should be accessible to you no matter what situation you are in. It can be as small or as large as it needs to be. I started to think about some other sanctuaries I've seen. For example, my dad's sanctuary consists of a decently sized TV, football games, a comfortable chair and air conditioning. Even on the smallest level, if he has just a radio to listen to a baseball game and a view of nature (whether it be the trees or the lake) he can find his peace.

My dad, Sekou Malik, at one of his favorite places in Lake Erie. 

My grandmother's sanctuary seems to be surrounded with lots of flourishing plants, flowers and bright colors. I did a full photography spread on her beautiful garden, and the first photo in this post is actually from her garden as well as is the following photo. Something about the beautiful colors gives her peace, and the fact that when my mother was alive, she was the one that bought all of the flowers that make up this garden. Her true sanctuary rests in her big comfortable bed reading the Word of God, which gives an unparalleled amount of peace to those who seek it.

My usual sanctuary is when I am in the bathtub. I light candles or incense. I have a whole set up which truly gives me great joy and relaxation. I have been making plans to expand my sanctuary to my bedroom, giving it a full redesign making it the perfect getaway. My own wonderland. I also love to incorporate teas and literature into my atmosphere. On the most basic level, I am happy reading with dim lighting and candles. I'm all about the lighting. It calms me and soothes my spirit. I also find great peace looking out my window to see blue skies and bright green treetops.

Why am I doing all of this? Because without the small things that give me joy on a daily basis, I will easily get caught up gazing into the future waiting for the harvest of all my work. Have you ever tried sitting and watching a plant grow? I would assume it's quite agonizing. We mustn't forget to live in the present while striving for the future. I've realized the more ambitious you are, the more your world revolves around the future and not the here and now.

My mother died a few years ago at the age of 46. She was in the middle of a home renovation when she passed out, never to be the same again. She had plans after plans made and ready to go. As accomplished as she was at the time, there was always more to achieve. There will always be more to accomplish as we humans are plagued with a rabbit hole that keeps our race thrusting forward into existence. Life is truly about balance. Once you learn the art of balance, you will have mastered your universe. Find your sanctuary. Create your happiness today, and continue pushing towards tomorrow.


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